Yalie McFakesit is back on the scene. And how. He "wrote" a book called Decision Points, which sounds like the name of a Nicholas Cage movie where he and only he can to stop a terrorist bomb, but his skinny pregnant wife with perpetually mournful eyes is about to go into labor and there are decisions. To. Be. Made. Lots and lots of decisions.
By "wrote," I'm sure Yalie dictated rambling thoughts to some minion who schlepped the audio to a sadsack ghostwriter who couldn't sell his second novel. And notice the timing: Yalie's book is coming out juuuuuust after the midterm elections. Thanks, book publisher. Really, you guys are doing a heck of a job being members of the liberal media. Just great. Keep it up.
With all the fanfare surrounding W., I think I'll remind The Media (including Oprah, who appears to have a fawning interview with him on today, dammit emoticon) and you, dear readers, of just some of the stupid, ass-clown, paint-sniffing, chode-licking things he's done:
1) Actually expanded the federal government by broadening presidential powers, trying to change the Constitution to dictate which citizens can get married, and my favorite, No Child Left Behind, which instituted federal standards on local schools. What a model of conservatism—Ronald must be so proud. (Ass.)
2) Came into office with a federal budget surplus of $128 billion but managed to run up our deficit to $4 trillion in just eight years. That's a lot of hundies. Sadly, Uncle Sam doesn't have a daddy like Yalie McFakesit does to pay off his credit card bills. (Ass mat.)
3) Started a war under false and refutable circumstances. Running tally of Americans dead in Iraq to date: 4,427. Tally of Iraqis: no one fucking knows. And we're still there. (Ass tank)
4) In 2001, he let Osama bin Laden escape Tora Bora. We could of had this guy dead nine years ago had our beloved Mission Accomplished Man-Child not farmed out the job to our ENEMIES. (Ass wipe.)
5) Didn't serve in Vietnam for one second, allowed people to think he did. Patriotism! (Ass nerd.)
I'm sure his book will be number one on the bestseller list. Maybe Yalie will donate the proceeds to Walter Reed?
1 comment:
I love that he says the worst moment of his presidency was when Kanye called him a racist. That was probably one of the better moments of his presidency.
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